My best friend sent me this, I think most are true some are not, but They certainly are hilarious Enjoy!
YOU HAVE CILANTRO GROWING IN THE WINDOWS AND FIRE ESCAPES , OR ANYWHERE IT FITS
you get pissed if during Christmastime, you go for a visit , and the were no rice and pigeon peas, and you let them know you are upset..
You’ve ever used your lips to point something out.
You’ve ever been hit with “chancletas”, ……………….a soft flip flop mom is wearing, and she beats you with it while pisses..and its so soft you end up laughing and she beats you harder..
or: with the cord of the iron ,she is using to iron with at the moment
You get really scared whenever someone mentions “El Cuuuuuco!!!”
You’ve gone to Titi’s house and passed through the “bead
curtain” in the living room.
You step into a house that has all those little figurines taking
up every inch of space on the TV and under the TV.
Your mother has a porcelain cat, dog, Buddha or elephant in her
Almost everyone you know is nicknamed “mira”.
You’ve eaten “esporsoda” with butter.
You have a perpetually drunk neighbor.
You know your mom is sneaking up on you because you can hear the
‘clack-clack’ of her “chancletas”.
Someone in you family is name “Maria”.
You have actually met several people named “Jesus”.
You treat fevers with “alcoholado”.
You need a cup of coffee after every meal.
Your uncle owns more gold than the jewelry shop down the street.
You’ve sat in a two-passenger car with over seven people in it,
and there’s a person shouting “Subete que caben mas!”.
You know at least four of your last names.
You scrunch up your nose to ask a silent “que ?”.
You’ve ever left grass out for the camels on the night of Jan.
5th., instead of leaving milk and cookies for Santa Claus on
You remember Ricky Martin as the little one from Menudo.
You were raised on Goya products (Si es Goya, tiene que ser
You consider the bad luck day to be “Tuesday” (not Friday the
Your sofa or rug is covered in plastic.
You start clapping when your plane hits the runway.
Your mother, tia, or hermana’s hair is black cherry, “sun in”
red, or a burgundy that would make Celia Cruz jealous.
You go to a wedding or Quinceanera party, gossip about how bad
the food is, but take a plate to go.
You can dance to merengue, cumbia, or salsa without music.
You think Christina can beat Oprah any day.
You can get to your house blindfolded because the smell of
chuletas is SO strong.
Your mother yells at the top of her lungs to call you to dinner
when you live in a one bedroom apartment.
Telenovenas have the status of holy ceremonies.
You think platanos are a whole separate food group.
You have a picture of “Cristo” in your house.
You think your name begins like this: “Ave Maria Purisima,
You walk around saying “Chacho”, or “Chacha” or “Ay Bendito”.
Others tell you to stop screaming when you’re really talking.
You know someone who drives a “Cheby”.
A balanced meal consists of rice and beans and some kind of meat.
You know the difference between “Carolina Rice” and everything
The thought of eating fried pork intestines filled with blood
and rice reminds you of Christmas.
You have at least 30 cousins. At least!
You know how to drive an “estandar” or “estic chift” car.
You can tell the difference between “Cafe Crema” and “Bustelo”.
And last, but not least:
Your grandmother thinks Vick’s Vapor Rub is the miracle cure for
I am so proud to be who i am !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you so much for reading my stuff:))))